LASIK: The part where I have surgery and then see everything.

Pre-leaving, annoyed by glasses part 1.

I can't believe it... a whole new world is before my eyes.

I opened my eyes this morning and I could see near, and far, and crisp, and detailed.  I can look out the window and read the license plate on my neighbor's car.  I haven't ever been able to see that well.  It's incredible.

So, Saturday.  That was the day of my surgery.  I decided to get into the city early to go see Avengers, which was awesome.  I hopped over to the clinic afterwards, a bit early, and got settled in for surgery.  Of course, I took a few pictures lamenting my glasses in preparation.  They fogged up more than once on the way, which annoyed me.  I couldn't see for the sunshine, which also bothered.  And they kept slipping down my sweaty face. No more, I say!

Gosh, I sure wish I had sunglasses.

I walked in and did some business to start everything out.  I gave the results from my HIV test (from last week).  I paid in cash my 100,000 baht, which was very fun to withdraw from the bank.  And when I asked for a phone charger because I was running low on battery, the fantastic Japanese woman found one for me.

I should have worn more comfortable pants, though.

They took me in to the Operating Space, and gave me some special shoes (they had to trade up to bigger ones because I have what my mother calls "canoe feet").  the nice nurse lady also gave me a surgical looking wrap that fit over my clothes and a sweet surgical cap.  She took my glasses and put them in my locker with all my stuff.  Oh, and before that, one woman served me a Valium to relax me.

Then, we walked into a bigger room with all these big armchairs in it.  I got sat down, reclined, and covered with a blanket.  They put numbing eye drops in my eyes over and over again.  The woman with the eye drops was obviously a pro with the eye dropping.  My consultant lady said that she had been working here for 10 years, and that is a lot of eye drops.

I got a 1,200 baht discount for paying in cash.

I was getting pretty loopy at this point, and I kept hearing the nurses chatting about "XL" which made me wonder if they were talking about my shoes.  Either way, I was there for awhile, getting eye drops all the time.  The doctor came over to talk about the surgery, telling me to relax, focus forward, and not squeeze my eyes.  I heard this often.

Then it was time.

They walked me into another room (seriously, how big is this place?) where the laser beams were.  I laid down on my back and tried to relax.  One of the nurses cleaned my face with iodine, then put what felt like a piece of clingy tape on my face.  It was some means of keeping my eyelashes open.  They cut little pieces open for my eyes, and mentioned that my eyelashes were particularly long and difficult.  Then, the doctor put a retractor on my eyes to keep them open even more.  This first laser was meant to create the flap on the cornea, and apparently is "the hard part".

Last ever photo of me with glasses on.  Pre surgery.

Gift bag 1 had valium, tylenol, face tape, and eye drops.
Gift bag 2 had more eye drops, eye shields, and q-tips.

It was very odd, I must say.  They put this thing really close to my face and then this robot voice came on and said something about suction.  Weird. I flinched right towards the end of the right eye laser, which scared the doctor, but all was still okay.  I managed to stay as still as I could on the left eye, so that was cool too.  This was quite unusual, and my high and nervous self kept telling that to the doctor.  Luckily, my personal consultant was holding my hand and everyone was reminding me to stay still.  They both laughed when I mentioned that practice makes perfect.

So then we got up and moved to another laser.  I laid back down once more, still with this odd tape on my face, and found my spot.  They moved this second laser onto my face, one with a bright circle of little LED lights, with a red and (maybe) green laser in the middle.  The doctor lifted up my flap, which made all the lights move and blur like when you're taking out contact lenses.  Then, the laser clicks on and whirrs, and you smell an unusual odor of singe.  The doctor puts the flap back on, and things go opaque and white.  She did the other eye in the same way, same process.  I was quite enjoying the look of the colors at this point.

#selfie

This whole laser to laser process took less than 10 minutes.  The laser parts were 10 seconds a piece, and the rest was just getting ready for the lasers.  The flaps the doctor was moving felt much longer, but they honestly weren't.  It was a super fast process.  By far the most painful part happened after it was all over; wen they removed that tape from my face.  That I did not enjoy.  They put me back in the giant armchair and put more drops in my eyes.  The doc also gave me some contacts that were supposed to keep the wound in check.

They gave me some sweet eye patches that made me look something like a bug, and that was it.  One hour from beginning to end.  Science.  I'm not supposed to squeeze my eyes too much or rub them.

I can see details through those little holes, and I'm pretty
darn stoked about that.

I had my favorite taxi driver, Khun Ann, pick me up.  She is one of the few people who knows my house, and someone I trust to get me from point a to point b.  She wasn't entirely sure why she was picking me up, and she seemed very worried to see my odd eye patches.  But, we talked and joked on the way home, then stopped at one of the few Mickey Ds drive throughs in the city, one quite near to my house.  I really wanted some junk food.

The eye patches made my depth perception quite poor, so Ann helped me into the house, and I went directly to bed.  Well, I took some medicine and went to bed.  It was one of the only nights in recent memory that I fell asleep without a book.

I fell asleep quickly, but I was in some pain in the night.  My eyes stung and felt dry and itchy.  I was awake in the middle of the night, aching as the numbing drops wore off.  I took some more medicine and thankfully fell asleep again, but it was an unpleasant sort of time.

Slightly on the achy side, but still able to read signs
and see what's going on.

But then I woke up again, with the light of day.  Even through the contacts making my vision blurry, and the eye patches where I can only see dots, I could see numbers across the street.  I could see details in the trees.  I could see the pictures on my wall.

I made some coffee and breakfast, and my buddy Joe came to pick me up.  He took me to the taxi stand since I wasn't sure I could ride a moto with any competence.  It gave him the idea to start a new business: the falang male escort service.  So, there's that.

Treating myself for the afternoon with a puzzle and some kitty
love.

I went back again for my day 1 appointment, where they took the eye shields off my face, took out my contacts (thank heavens, because they were uncomfortable), checked my vision, and made sure my wounds looked okay.  All done.  I went home and had a relaxing day, complete with nap.  I ended up a bit ill, though, my body aching, but I think this is unrelated.  I'm actually at home sick today because of a sore throat and some really aching flu joints, but otherwise, my eyes feel fantastic.

I have to put in lots of eye drops in the course of the next week, and my vision will fluctuate for the next week or two, but right now, I can see super well, and I'm incredibly thrilled that I've been able to accomplish this goal.  I can't wait to buy some cheap sunglasses and throw away the mess of glasses and contacts I've had.

Damn, My Eyes.

Watch the LASIK video, see the park.  Do you know how
distracted I was during this part?

Today it has been raining, finally bringing a measure of cool to the hot season here in the BKK.  I'm inspired to write a post about my recent medical experiences, especially since the heat and the humidity means I'm constantly pushing my glasses up my nose and wiping off the rain or fog.

I've wanted to get LASIK for years now.  Contacts and glasses have become the bane of my existence (not really, but let's say so for the current argument).  They are pretty annoying, always in the way.  They are also sometimes useful, hiding my eyes so no one can notice that I don't bother with makeup.

Either way, I made up my mind this month that now was the time, and so I promptly made an appointment at this place called TRSC in Bangkok, recommended to me by a coworker.  My appointment was last Saturday, following a Bangkok librarian's meeting in a similar part of town.  I'm sure that you're overwhelmed with the thrilling life that I lead overseas.

This place is gorgeous.

The place was easy to find, especially with the phone that gives me endless information for the taxi men.  The elevator in the building was less easy to find, but I eventually found myself on floor 6: TRSC.  I was late enough that I got a phone call right as I was about to get into the elevator.

Once I got upstairs, I was greeted by my personal consultant.  Little did I know that this woman would follow me around for the rest of my (nearly 3 hour) pre-op appointment.  She was amazingly useful.  They took my information, and I filled out my little registration form, which of course asked me about my hobbies: "reading, sports, internet."

My consultant and I walked around to all these rooms in this maze-like environment getting test after test that I had never had in the States.  The place and the people are pristine.  Each time I got a test, the technician would grab an ipad and ask me to rate their service with the 4 smiley face system I've seen in a few different airports.

Let me see if I can remember all the tests I took:
One flashing one that tested the cornea?
One where I had to look at a target picture (I had to do this one a couple times... I did it wrong).
One where the guy had a telescope-esque tool that fit on my eye.
Several where I had to read series of numbers and test my sight.
One with a blinking red dot.
Another flashing one that looked like it was designed by people on drugs.
One where the doctor lady looked at my eyes.
One where the doctor lady poked my eyes with a plastic stick (more pleasant than it sounds).

Coffee, Popcorn, Cookies.... what more do you need?

I'm sure I'm missing something.  They were all too efficient, moving me from room to room with the most polite people I've ever encountered.

They also had me watch this "movie" about LASIK and the risks and expectations so that I would be informed.  They sat me down at a computer, then offered me coffee and popcorn.  Yes, please.  I got seconds on the popcorn because it was a very long presentation.  I also found myself somewhat distracted given the computer room had a picture window that overlooked Lumphini park and Bangkok.

They also dilated my eyes, which I found made it so I couldn't see my phone with my glasses on, and couldn't see anything else with my glasses off.  That was entertaining.

The glasses graveyard.

Of course, one thing I had to do in order to get LASIK surgery is get an HIV test (because the one I got in August is too far back).  No problem.  I decided to check out the local hospital in my village, which was an experience in itself.  I feel like I experienced two levels of medical service in the Thailand.

This hospital... I have no clue the name... is full of humans, of various levels of working and busi-ness.  The majority are young women, almost always wearing this odd shade of blue polyester uniform and a hair piece with a bow and net to hold the large bulk of hair that many Thai women have.

I get in, sit down, get my weight and blood pressure checked (and why?).  One lady sits me down and proceeds to draw my blood (without gloves on).  Oh, boy. Never coming here again. Then they charge me about $25 for the time and effort, and while I wait I get the pleasure of watching the holiday festivities.

Today is the Coronation Day of the King.  The part that I caught of the holiday was the King getting pushed in his wheelchair down to the van.  I later catch a bit more with the monks, then some with him in the bit fancy room in Wat Phra Kaew.  It's full of tradition, and many nurses were watching the television raptly.

I grabbed my results after I did a bit of shopping (seeking some materials for Jade's Under the Sea party), and noticed the complete lack of privacy in the hospital.  My results from the last hospital came in a sealed package that I had to open like a paycheck, but this is just a little envelope with a piece of tape in it.  Ah well, it's no matter; I put them in a rush because I saw a large cloud looming and knew I didn't want to get caught in the storm.  I did anyway, but it was cooling and refreshing.

Surgery is on Saturday, so I will have the laser beams (as Joe calls them) fix my eyes in the best way possible. No more pushing up those glasses anymore!