On Food: The Diagnosis That Started it All

While I’m on the subject of cooking, I am interested in talking about food.  My diet has become stricter and stricter in recent months, and I’m noticing some changes in my body as a result of the healthy eating.

But let me begin from when the journey started.  In April, I was diagnosed with something called PCOS, Polycystic Ovary Syndrome.  I was diagnosed in Thailand, by a doctor who looked with an ultrasound and found some black spots on my ovaries.  In retrospect, he made the diagnosis quite quickly and didn’t really explain to me what it all meant, but I believed that I had it.  It is a disorder characterized by some hormonal changes, the inability to bear children or ovulate correctly, and comes with an extreme increase in the possibility of diabetes.  Because of my diagnosis, and the risk of diabetes, I decided to make some changes in my diet. 

I started by cutting out added sugar from my diet.  Cookies, and cakes, and sweets of any kind, plus soda and anything that has extreme sugars went away.  I treated myself from time to time with something sweet, but, on the whole, I was pretty good about getting rid of added sugar foods for the benefit of my health.  Getting off of added sugar was a bit rough, and continues to be rough during certain times, and sometimes it takes me every amount of my energy to deny myself something delicious and sweet.  But, I knew that I needed to do it for my health, and so I did.

I kept moving farther on the non-sugar train, particularly as my taste buds began to shift.  I cut out more things from my diet, slowly taking the sugar and the things that make sugar out of my diet.  I took out most alcohol.  I took out most bread and grains.  I took out almost everything that is processed or packaged in any way.  All these things make sugar, and I was so afraid of the risk of diabetes that I kept moving farther and farther from anything that resembled sugar in my body.

It hasn’t been an easy road, and it was one of the things that encouraged me to take up cooking when I moved to Moscow.  Now, for some recent memory, my diet is mostly vegetables, particularly spinach, lettuce, and carrots, with oatmeal and yogurt in the morning and salad and meat at lunch.  And, in fact, when this is disrupted, it brings my body to a very unpleasant sort of place.  This is, in fact, the catalyst for this blog post.  I went off my diet this weekend because of travel with a group of young people on a robotics trip, and my body is feeling worse than it has in weeks because of it.

I noticed this as well earlier in the week.  In fact, I decided to celebrate a recent trip to the doctor with a special bit of food.  I went to the doctor here in Russia and found out that I do not actually have PCOS, that my lady parts all look healthy and normal.  Part of me wonders if I had it at all, and the other part thinks the food might have been able to change things for me.  I wanted to celebrate this occasion and decided to do so with a special treat: bread.

So, I went to my favorite grocery store, bought a loaf of the most delicious looking bread that I could find, and made a bread and cheese plate with balsamic and olive oil to enjoy.  After this food, I passed out in a food coma of sorts.  And when I woke up, there was a hangover left in my body that I hadn’t felt in recent history.  My knees and joints felt a bit sore and inflamed, my head had cotton in it, and I just didn’t feel great.  I felt bloated and sick with the food.  And now, in coming back from the trip, I feel much the same.  I ate processed food and bread at the weekend, and far too many of them, and I’m very much regretting that at this moment.   I feel sore again, with my knees acting up and my eyes all puffy. 

I wonder about the food, because I used to have such problems with my knees when I started to run and exercise, and now I don’t notice them.  It’s hard to tell how much of this is from the food and how much from the exercise, but I’ve seen a difference in my body and the way it reacts.  Perhaps bread and processed foods make my joints ache.  Either way, food is a current obsession of mine, and I’m starting to subscribe to ideas about how food can greatly improve life.  I’m watching the documentaries, reading the books, seeing news, and it is making a change on the types of things I will ingest.

I don’t have PCOS, either because I never had it, or because my diet helped my body heal it.  Either way, I’ve found the foods that make my body healthy and happy.  Sadly, I don’t think bread is in that category, or sugars, or packaged foods.  But even without the disease, I can’t quit the path that I’ve found to make my body feel good and have the energy I need at school and at home. 

And given the recent experiences I had with asking for the food, I think I need a word like “vegetarian” that fully encompasses that idea.  I’m not a vegetarian because I eat meat.  I’m not a vegan because I have the occasional cheese and milk.  But we don’t really have a word for people who don’t eat the bread or grain or processed food or packaged food or starch and would really just like something green and delicious to eat.  It would be handy to say that instead of trying to explain all the things that end up making me sick.

Voluntourism

When I was at the IB conference in Singapore, I was fortunate enough to listen to a talk from Tessa Boudrie, a woman who has been working as a social worker in Asia for years and years.  She currently runs a business that connects philanthropists with philanthropic opportunities, in Asia, and was speaking on choosing a good organization for the school to support.  She's a consultant, which has become a much needed business in this world that I now live in.  She worked in Cambodia, and gave several examples of this in her talk, in Burma, in Singapore, in Hong Kong, all over.  The talk was... phenomenal.  She laid her talk out in bullet points and examples; how should one choose an organization?  Look for this and this and this, else this and this is likely happening.

Voluntourism, which is volunteering for short stints of time in a foreign country, is a relatively new idea, and one that is catching on quickly.  There are organizations that provide short trips for students, for church groups, for adults, for anyone, for any amount of time.  Sometimes people pick up activities that are philanthropic while they visit another country.  I know people who've done that as well.  It's everywhere at this point, especially in countries with less infrastructure, like Cambodia.

There are huge implications for this.  Huge.  And so, here I write, hoping that the mind of at least one soul will be opened up.  I heard the talk, and noted the concerns, and thought a week, and edited more.  I'm very torn on this issue, torn on the things that I've seen and heard and experienced.  I volunteered throughout high school, throughout college; I was a Peace Corps Volunteer.  Now, I'm working through some intense reflection and looking through a different lens.  I'm going to go through my notes on her presentation, and present them to you.  She had examples, and I have examples, and it will be a big mash up of the two.  She put into clear words and phrases the things that I was beginning to grasp onto as I worked and lived in Cambodia.

We need to think about the differences between development and charity.  Development, where we help someone improve something about their life, something that they've identified they could change with a little help... and Charity, giving things to others.  That's the drive behind this.

Is the organization....

...needs based?
I saw this so often.  One day while I was working at school, an electric piano appeared on the doorstep.  It was a gift from the Korean government, part of an initiative to get Cambodian kids to enjoy playing music more.  There were a few problems with this idea.  One, there was no electricity to plug this piano into.  The school had no such thing.  Two, what teacher is going to lead a kid through this discovery?  None of our teachers knew how to play the piano.  I could tap a few keys into a melody from having a computer, but I can't well do that without electricity.  Three, any and all valuable (including school books) were usually kept locked up... when was this theoretical child meant to learn this?  They were answering an idea from their own lips, not the ideas of the school.

...addressing the symptoms instead of the roots?
She gave an example of an organization wanting funding for victims of acid attacks.  It had become this huge issue in Cambodia, because people were using it as a weapon that lasts forever.  Acid won't kill you, just disfigure you and make your life miserable.  They wanted all this money to provide care for these victims, and she was able to direct some money to media and government to provide change for the root issue.  She was able to get the laws changed to more serious sentences and provide PSAs that made the attacks unacceptable for society.  Along with her partners, they were able to address the root of the cause and dramatically reduce the number of people needing this assistance.

...best interests of the beneficiary?
This one hit home for me.  Peace Corps became for me something that served my resume and my personal development far more than it did those around me.  It's not uncommon, I know, but I wonder sometimes why I really went overseas in the first place.  I lived, I learned, and I hope that a voluntourist would consider seriously what they are hoping to accomplish by spending a week volunteering in a world and a culture that they don't know very well.  Especially when it comes to building things or working with children... I, too, did Habitat for Humanity while in Cambodia, and I look back on that and laugh at the misery I was.  It was also April, the hottest month of the year, and we were out building houses with concrete.  How silly of me to think that I knew what I was doing more than the man who has built homes for 30 years.... And yet, there I was.  Consider this as well, please.

...community driven?
I'll redirect this one back to the piano.  And, actually, a positive story.  Peace Corps does teach you to ask for what your partners want and try your darndest to give it to them.  I noticed a need with the bathrooms, that the girls were having a rough go at school because they didn't have clean restrooms to use.  My brother, Phil, helped give the money that built the bathroom, and I would hope that it is still in working order and being used.  The school community wanted a fence around the tree, though.  I didn't build a fence around the tree.  I think back on that and really wonder... I wonder if the bathroom is locked up like the school books and the fence around the tree magically popped up with some money.  The VSOers, with money from the US government, built a pediatric center that looked pretty awesome though.  It was needed, and wanted, and driven by those who wanted it.

...registered?
Is it real?  Maybe that sounds like an odd one to you, but in this wild west that is SE Asia, it isn't that much of a stretch.  It's easy to lie here.  It's easy to find a place for money.

...exit strategy?
I had a bit of a beef with lots of NGOs in Cambodia with this.  This one looks at the long term goal of any organization, which likely should include something about being done.  They fixed the main problem, or dealt with the big issues, or trained up locals to take over completely.  The white folk (or the Japanese folk, or the whoever folk) shouldn't necessarily be living on their NGO salary for the rest of their days.  What is the endgame?  Or is there one?

...serving the greater good or individuals?
She gave an example of a school sending two bright on full scholarships to Oxford, and how that money could feed an entire village for the better part of the year.  This was also the main criticism of JPA, just so you are aware.

...other players in the similar field?
There are a multitude of education NGOs in Cambodia.  None (or few) of them work together.

...financially vulnerable/audit?
Where's the money coming from?  Where's it going?  I'll say, I began to get very suspicious of big NGOs in Cambodia... they often had the biggest, fanciest cars driving around the place with their logos stapled on.

...sustainable?
People love this word.  Love it.  And it means a couple of things.  How is the business running?  How is it funded?  Are they beginning to make their own money and need an injection like a start up?  Or is it entirely donation based?  One of those is more sustainable than the other one, usually, that is.  Is it a business that could last if some things were shaken up?  It is a business, right?

...Reporting?
They should be reporting.  Often.

...Religious?
My family in the village became Christian because there were opportunities they could access in the city.  She didn't usually support those organizations because there were requirements to benefit from the services.  I've seen a very good one, that I support, and some much less good ones, so I'm torn on the issues.

...Political?
Hopefully I don't have to explain that one.

...Emergency?
I thought of the scene in Clueless when she was telling us about this one.  Cher donates her skis for the Pismo Beach Disaster Relief.  Emergency giving is often fraught with chaos, amazingly unorganized.  Usually donations are hard to manage.  Plus, the real needs come about 6-8 months later, when the aid starts to run out and people are getting back to real life.

...Foreign staffed?
Hopefully they are training up local staff to take over.  If not, it may be something to consider.

...an orphanage?
Ms. Boudrie is very passionate about this issue.  She never supports orphanages, ever.  Ever.  EVER.  I agreed before her talk, and now I agree more.  The vast majority of "orphans" in Cambodia are not orphans, just kids from a poor home.  Sometimes they are made to perform on the street.  Sometimes they are begging on the street and giving the money to some sort of kingpin around the alley.  Most of them were convinced to come to the orphanage with promises, and the number of orphanages has grown in a very similar pattern to that of tourism.

There are worse stories.  My teacher friend told me a story of visiting an orphanage in Vietnam.  It was run by some white fellas, and her teacher friend (a man) took her and another gal to this other place to give some school supplies and stuffs to these kids.  The men asked him which kid he wanted to take.  And to make sure he had him back by Friday.  No foreigner, no tourist, no person without the proper clearances and paperwork and everything, should be taking care of children or visiting children in orphanages.  Can you imagine trying to visit an orphanage or a group home in America?  In Europe?  Why is it okay in Asia?  It's not okay.  It is never okay.  If you don't work with these particular children, you shouldn't be visiting them.  Period.  My school doesn't allow anyone on campus that doesn't belong.... the same should be true for any space where children are present.  This nonsense has to stop.  No More Orphanages.

I'm forcing myself to stop now.  Please, please consider what it is you are doing before you try to swing a hammer for "poor people" someplace else.  Instead, start at home, in a culture that you understand, support responsible trade and tourism, and if you have something valuable to share, like a skill, figure out how to teach it to some people.  But, please, don't assume that you are saving the world by spending a week working on things that you don't know how to do.  And please, evaluate and reflect on your choices to volunteer overseas before you barge into another country and someone's home like the colonists of old.  Show dignity by increasing development.

References:
Voluntourism

The Pope, and his guide to happiness!

I like this pope.  This pope is neat.

In latest interview, Pope Francis reveals top 10 secrets to happiness

Posted from Carol Glatz, Catholic News Service

VATICAN CITY (CNS) -- Slowing down, being generous and fighting for peace are part of Pope Francis' secret recipe for happiness.

In an interview published in part in the Argentine weekly "Viva" July 27, the pope listed his Top 10 tips for bringing greater joy to one's life:

1. "Live and let live." Everyone should be guided by this principle, he said, which has a similar expression in Rome with the saying, "Move forward and let others do the same."

2. "Be giving of yourself to others." People need to be open and generous toward others, he said, because "if you withdraw into yourself, you run the risk of becoming egocentric. And stagnant water becomes putrid."

3. "Proceed calmly" in life. The pope, who used to teach high school literature, used an image from an Argentine novel by Ricardo Guiraldes, in which the protagonist -- gaucho Don Segundo Sombra -- looks back on how he lived his life.

"He says that in his youth he was a stream full of rocks that he carried with him; as an adult, a rushing river; and in old age, he was still moving, but slowly, like a pool" of water, the pope said. He said he likes this latter image of a pool of water -- to have "the ability to move with kindness and humility, a calmness in life."

4. "A healthy sense of leisure." The pleasures of art, literature and playing together with children have been lost, he said.

"Consumerism has brought us anxiety" and stress, causing people to lose a "healthy culture of leisure." Their time is "swallowed up" so people can't share it with anyone. Even though many parents work long hours, they must set aside time to play with their children; work schedules make it "complicated, but you must do it," he said.  Families must also turn off the TV when they sit down to eat because, even though television is useful for keeping up with the news, having it on during mealtime "doesn't let you communicate" with each other, the pope said.

5. Sundays should be holidays. Workers should have Sundays off because "Sunday is for family," he said.

6. Find innovative ways to create dignified jobs for young people. "We need to be creative with young people. If they have no opportunities they will get into drugs" and be more vulnerable to suicide, he said.  "It's not enough to give them food," he said. "Dignity is given to you when you can bring food home" from one's own labor.

7. Respect and take care of nature. Environmental degradation "is one of the biggest challenges we have," he said. "I think a question that we're not asking ourselves is: 'Isn't humanity committing suicide with this indiscriminate and tyrannical use of nature?'"

8. Stop being negative. "Needing to talk badly about others indicates low self-esteem. That means, 'I feel so low that instead of picking myself up I have to cut others down,'" the pope said. "Letting go of negative things quickly is healthy."

9. Don't proselytize; respect others' beliefs. "We can inspire others through witness so that one grows together in communicating. But the worst thing of all is religious proselytism, which paralyzes: 'I am talking with you in order to persuade you,' No. Each person dialogues, starting with his and her own identity. The church grows by attraction, not proselytizing," the pope said.

10. Work for peace. "We are living in a time of many wars," he said, and "the call for peace must be shouted. Peace sometimes gives the impression of being quiet, but it is never quiet, peace is always proactive" and dynamic.

Kelsey's words:
There is much that we can take from this.  I really respect the pope, in a way that before hasn't felt as crucial.  This pope, with his simple clothing and his respect for all people, is leading with such a strong example.  In my quest for happiness and a fulfilling life, I can certainly take some of his cues into my own example.  I'm not sure about the dignified jobs, or the proselytizing, but the rest are all things I can fold into my own life.

In this, the beginning of my habits in BKK, I think I can keep these in mind as I proceed.  I am particularly interested in the idea of proceeding calmly through life.  I have been so excited recently about this transformation and this movement.  It's been very hard to focus and place my attention on just one thing.  I'm sure my blogs seem disjointed, or at least they do to me.  And so, I read, take into account the advice, and log it away.  I want to be the calm water, though, for those around me.  And this I will work on.

Slowly but surely, onward.

T Minus Three Days

It's getting closer and closer by the minute.  Last Monday I drove with Aaron, the boyfriend, back to Iowa.  We happened upon the world's largest candle, the world's largest truck stop, and a very disappointing large chair, and I was able to finish a few more rows of my cross stitch and enjoy a couple more hours with the best man I've ever known.  After visits to both sides of my family, a bunch of sweet corn consumption, and a trip in the sail boat, I dropped him off at the airport.  It was a rough day, and solidified the need to move back to Pittsburgh to see him, or to reconnect in another way.  I miss him already, and his absence is forcing me to focus on the upcoming trip and my goals and plans for it.  There are many things I want to do, things that will put me in a good place for my upcoming 30th birthday.  Bangkok will hopefully provide me with the time, money, and quiet to do these things.

I'm always shifting and changing my goals, but a couple of them are already set.

1.  Save as much money as possible in order to travel, pay off loans, and pad the emergency fund and IRA.
2.  Organize a lifetime of photographs to be able to search easily and securely.
3.  Increase my mindfulness and shift bad habits by creating good habits.
4.  Find the enjoyment and pleasures of cooking by cooking often.
5.  Further my career in as many ways as possible and continue to work on my lifelong learning.

To that end, this blog will begin.  It will be a catalogue of successes, or life changes, of accountability for my goals.  Hopefully, I will encounter some entertaining people in order to provide some funny stories.  It will be a blog that will have a different vibe than the previous; instead of focusing on just the stories that effected me, I will also be discussing the effects that I have on myself.  I want to change certain aspects of my life so that I can be mindful of the gratitude that surges through me with every passing moment.  I want to find joy in everything and share that with the world at large.

Three days til liftoff.